Wednesday of Holy Week

The experience of betrayal is one of the most painful of human experiences. Many people have seen the trust they placed in someone prove to be unfounded. The one who betrays is recognized in hindsight to have two faces, the face presented to others and the hidden face that is only revealed in time. Jesus entered fully into this painful experience of betrayal. Judas was one of the Twelve, a member of Jesus’ inner circle, who were intended by Jesus to be a symbol of the renewed twelve tribes of Israel. Jesus had invested himself in Judas as he had in the other members of the Twelve. Judas had heard what Jesus said and had seen his mighty works. Yet, for reasons we will never comprehend, he became disillusioned with Jesus, especially as the likelihood of Jesus’ rejection and death became apparent. For the sum of thirty pieces of silver, he agreed to make it possible for the religious leaders to arrest Jesus discreetly, out of view of the public. When Jesus announces the presence of his betrayer at the last supper, the question the disciples ask in Matthew’s gospel is not simply, ‘Is it I?’, as in Mark, but ‘Is it I, Lord?’ The title ‘Lord’ was used to address the risen Jesus in the church Matthew was writing his gospel for. Matthew was inviting the members of his church to ask this question of themselves. We can all make their question our own, ‘Is it I, Lord?’ We ask ourselves if we have behaved in ways that betrays our identity as brothers and sisters of Jesus, called to be faithful to God’s will for our lives, as Jesus was. Judas subsequently despaired of his betrayal and hanged himself. Unlike Peter, he failed to see that Jesus was all merciful and that he had lived and died for the forgiveness of sins. Our own failure to live up to the trust the Lord has placed in us need not lead us to discouragement, much less despair. Based on all the Lord has said to us and done for us we can confidently ask the question at the end of today’s psalm, ‘The Lord is coming to my help, who dare condemn me?’